CouplesTherapy
in San Diego, CA
Are You Feeling Distant Or Disconnected From Your Partner?
Are you questioning the direction your relationship is headed but don’t know how to communicate or work through this with your significant other?
Have you noticed any of the negative patterns within your relationship or with your partner:
Unconstructive conflict, flighting, or arguing?
A lack of communication or intimacy?
Disconnect, detachment, or withdrawal?
Perhaps the relationship started well in the beginning but has gradually become unfulfilling or unhealthy over time. Or maybe this is a recent disconnect that has formed in response to a larger situation or circumstance you are working through.
Issues In Relationships Can Get Worse If Not Properly Addressed
You may crave closeness with your partner, but reaching out or bridging the disconnect feels risky. Emotionally, you probably feel lonely, frustrated, or even numb. You may be blaming your partner without taking responsibility for your role—or you might question your own worth and wonder if you’re the root of the problem.
The good news is that relationships are fluid and with the right effort, positive changes are possible within yours. An engaged couples therapist can help you work toward breaking unhelpful patterns, building trust, and strengthening your bond. I work with couples who want to strengthen their relationships with themselves and each other—even if they have to rebuild them from the ground up. And although therapy doesn’t erase all challenges, it can help support couples who are ready to build healthier patterns together.
Most Couples Have Issues At Some Point In Their Relationship
All relationships go through their share of ups and downs along the way. It isn’t the challenges that couples face but how they respond to these issues that matter most. Couples can work through enormous challenges together and come out stronger on the other side, but sometimes, they might need some outside support to get there.
In addition to this, marriage and couples therapy can prove quite effective when approached with the right attitude. For example, according to a study from the National Institute for Mental Health (NIMH), “Gottman’s couples therapy approach had positive effects on improving marital adjustment and couples’ intimacy.” (1)
Some Couples Need Outside Support To Move Past Their Issues
Sometimes, the significance of addressing relationship issues can get pushed aside and overlooked until these issues worsen. Larger factors, like generational trauma and differences in attachment styles, can cause or contribute to relationship issues as well. Often, couples focus on surface-level issues without exploring the deeper roots of their problems.
Couples therapy can help you develop long-term goals for your relationship, guided by each of your desires for the relationship and informed by the insights that emerge during our work. Whether you’re in the middle of a crisis in your relationship or just fine-tuning your dynamic, we can work on rebuilding intimacy and fostering deeper emotional attunement.
Couples Therapy Helps You Reconnect And Restore Your Bond
When you’ve fallen into unhealthy patterns with your partner, it can be difficult to break the cycle without checking out or giving up on the relationship. But continuing within a negative dynamic with your partner often only creates resentment and pushes you further away from each other.
In couples therapy can help you learn how to communicate more effectively, understand each other on a deeper level, and reconnect emotionally. We’ll also explore how each partner’s early relational experiences and unconscious dynamics may be shaping their expectations of and reactions to the present. By seeing each partner as their own individual and exploring their unique communication and attachment styles, therapy can enhance your ability to connect and help you work toward positive changes in your relationship.
A Holistic, Integrative Approach To Couples Therapy
I incorporate multiple modalities within my couples therapy work, including:
Gottman Method – A research-driven approach to couples therapy, the Gottman method can help couples improve communication and more effectively address conflict.
Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) – An evidence-driven therapeutic modality, EFT can help couples better understand, process, and express their emotions.
Psychodynamic Therapy (PDT) – A form of psychotherapy that examines unconscious processes, Psychodynamic Therapy helps couples explore how previous relationships may be influencing their current one.
Mentalization-Based Treatment for Couples (MBT-C) – In developing mentalization skills, MBT can help couples better reflect on their own and each other’s mental states.
The Gottman method can help you communicate more effectively, de-escalate arguments, and build greater emotional safety together—while EFT can help both partners understand their underlying attachment needs and practice expressing vulnerability in ways that deepen the connection between you. Psychodynamic Therapy can help you shift repetitive cycles, with Mentalization-Based Treatment helping to build empathy and reduce misunderstandings.
It’s common for couples to feel dissatisfied or stuck—but with the proper support, a stronger partnership is within your reach. With guidance, support, and commitment, you can move from a relationship defined by conflict and distance toward one that feels more secure, connected, and fulfilling.
You May Still Have Some Questions About Couples Therapy…
I’m worried that talking about our issues will only make things worse.
Many clients worry that talking about their issues will intensify conflict or trigger painful emotions. But therapy actually provides a structured, supportive space to address these issues safely and constructively. The goal, of course, isn’t to argue but to better understand each other and find healthier ways to reconnect and resolve conflict.
I’m concerned that my partner will be resistant to therapy or change.
Some worry that therapy will focus only on them or that their own concerns will be minimized. In our work together, we create a space where both partners are heard and supported without blame or judgment. Healing and change can occur when both partners are willing to reflect, grow, and take ownership of their roles in the relationship dynamic.
I’m anxious that going to therapy is a sign that my relationship is failing.
Seeking therapy doesn’t mean that a relationship is broken—it means that you’re committed to working through challenges and building a stronger, more resilient connection. Most couples face challenges in their relationship and in their lives. Therapy can help you navigate the hardships with clarity and care so you can deepen your connection.
You Can Repair Your Connection And Rebuild Your Relationship
If you are feeling out of tune with your partner, couples therapy with Deep Sea Psychology can help you repair your bond and build toward a healthier, more fulfilling relationship together.
Please call 619-797-5258 or utilize the contact page to get started.
(1) https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC6037577/
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